Hi! My name is Mandy and I have just celebrated my first year since having a ruptured brain aneurysm in April 2025. I feel so lucky to just be here, the fact that I’m healthy and living a normal life is just amazing and so appreciated.
My story began at work, I’m a nurse and was on shift one Thursday, when I started to feel quite nauseous and on talking could hear my voice outside of my head. I knew something was wrong, then I had this awful instant headache pain, and that’s all I remember. I collapsed to the floor, and woke up again 2 hours later in resus. I’m so lucky I work in a hospital, because I received instant medical attention.
I had a clip inserted into my brain, and a week later I was at home recovering! It’s been a long, hard and emotional year. I’ve battled through the initial pain of surgery, learning to be reliant on my family and friends, when usually I’m the “strong one.” I lost my independence and my identity, I lost me in a way too, but I’ve found a new me! I’ve learned to live with survivor guilt, I don’t think it will ever leave me, but it doesn’t own me anymore.
3 months after my aneurysm I was diagnosed with PTSD, this related to the trauma of my collapse, which was really hard as it centred around work. So my return to nursing was really scary as I thought I’d never be able to do my job again. One because of some cognitive impairment, but also because some triggers were every day events when working in a hospital.
I had EMDR; Eye Movement Desensitisation Reprocessing and this was absolutely amazing at filing away all of those triggers. I’m now back at work, and loving it. I have to watch for triggers, but I’ve learned how to manage them. I think I’ve improved my memory and concentration, but I can still become overwhelmed and need to ensure I take breaks, and importantly go gentle on myself at times. I live with cognitive impairment, which is largely memory issues, less able to multitask as I can become overwhelmed. I can become fatigued, but I do feel that’s starting to fade a little.
I’m back in the gym, I’m driving, an I’ve been back on an aeroplane!
I’ve taken up a new hobby of photography, because I see all the small detail now, it’s like I have a new set of eyes that see all the wonders of life. I’m so appreciative for being alive, I’m calmer, less stressed, spontaneous, and just try to take enjoyment from everything. I continue to be a wife and a mother, I feel guilty for what I put all my family through, as we all went through a traumatic experience. But I really know how much I mean to them, and how happy I am to still be with them.
So my brain aneurysm did, and remains to impact my life, I’m anxious and scared at times, and I’m still angry with why this happened to me; but I don’t dwell on that. So now I’m thriving, learning about the new me and everything I’m determined to see in my future ❤️
